Very simple homework this week. All you have to do is come up with a 5 line limerick explaining something we have covered this year in chemistry. Look over your sylabus and you will see that we have covered
The nature of matter
Elements, mixtures and compounds
Particulate state of matter
Absolute zero
Gases under pressure
Diffusion
Atoms and elements
Ions, ionic bonding, ionic compounds
Covalent bonds
The periodic table, periods, groups
Properties of groups
Atomic structure
You can also write on experimental techniques, which we should cover later on in the term and on any subject that you feel you can enlighten the rest of us on.
You will get marks for wit, intelleigence and factual content. The homework is only the 5-line Limerick but if you want to go overboard and write a full ode to chemistry then feel free to submit these by email to the usual address and I will post the best ones right here as the main body and you will get a credit the day after it appears online.
Original stories involving chemicals in bizarre adventures will also be considered, original computer artwork can be posted too.
In case you are unsure of what a limerick is, they are a kind of poem. Limericks have a special form. There are five lines, with lines 1, 2 and 5 rhyming, and lines 3 and 4 are rhyming. Good limericks use different words at the end of each line. They also need the right rhythm, or metre:
| d'DAH-dah d'DAH-dah d'DAH (dah)
d'DAH-dah d'DAH-dah d'DAH (dah) d'DAH-dah d'DAH d'DAH-dah d'DAH d'DAH-dah d'DAH-dah d'DAH |
|
There WAS an old MAN from DarJEEling
Who TRAVelled from LONdon to EALing It SAID on the DOOR Please don't SPIT on the FLOOR So he CAREfully SPAT on the CEILing |
Notice how we can sneak in the odd syllable here and there.
Post all limericks in the comments box, anything larger send to me first.
Good luck!
45 comments:
u mate need a grl..maybe you got one but are unable to woo her..ur not..*ahem* are you?=P..KIDDING!
ne ways I HATE LIMERICKS!!
Thanks. I've shown my wife this comment and she completely agrees with you.
By the way, this homework is to be done by Wednesday - you can post up any time before then
okaay mate..ur scaring me=P
your poor wife, i feel truly sorry fer her=P
Good Gawd you are really scaring me mate!=P
BTW i really pity that unfortunate woman who end up marrying you=P
do we really need ta do this..:S am no litriture(i cant even spell it=P)fan.
..flippin blogger web..takes 3 hours ta post 1 comment on!
Yes you do - I will be chasing this homework up just like every other. No excuses
but SIR!!:'(
ok u proved that your heartless, but i didnt think to tht extent!..
i havnt written a poem in a while *scratchz 'ead*
but i'll giv id a shot
k here goez
evrey atom wana be a noble gas
by sharin or takin or w/e else day can do
2 8 18 id all da same 2 me
y dey wana be noble i hav no klew
peace out y'all
3zooz-pu<--plutonium da symbol i chose 4 test kuz i can't remeber first 1
P.S.(post subject or somthin) i only advertise 4 www.disizstupid.blogspot.com
id lookin 4 som writerz now u should stick 2 da theme @ first but l8er u can write anythin u want c da forum on da site 4 details..
from lithuim;
sir i don't think anyone in dis class is a literatur geek but i just had to do dat hwk.
sir u need 2 choose da best out of dis:(plz put me a good grade, i tried ma best)
The nature of matter 1
Da nature of matter is basically fair
In a gas its only just air
As in a liquid it totally flows
But in a solid it can't move so
These states of matter are really blare
The nature of matter 2
You can judge a solid by its firm fat crate
Or judge a liquid in its flowing trait
But in a gas it's everywhere
As from here and over there
Its all one thing the nature of state
Absolute zero
When you reach this point in the Kelvin scale
It means you are at the zero frail
Where it's frozen to death
And you can't move the froth
you just become so pale
(sir dis one sucks)
Atomic structure
To find an atoms structure
Look at da bottom number
Find protons and electrons
But put down all the neutrons
Till you glance dat freaky mass number.
It's lithuim 3Li
guyz, sir, dis is platinium, im doin dis cuz i hav 2
evenzo i suck in english(C!!!)
for som reson all atoms wanna be a noble gas
zey do it by 2 types of bonding:
covalent bonding, datz so freaky, cuz 7+7=8, tiz all about sharing
or ionic bonding, wer non metals and metals combin 2gezer, only if the have opposite valency( +1 & -1)
sir datz my BEST!!!!! ICAN'T DO BETTER
from al
we described the states of matter and this doesn't matter
explained diffusion and this was confusing.
we learned about the relitive atomic mass and
the formation of ions wheather they gain or lose electrons.
from al
we described the states of matter and this doesn't matter
explained diffusion and this was confusing.
we learned about the relative atomic mass and
the formation of ions whether they gain or lose electrons.
ok here it goes mmmmate=P
*ahem*
there was a atom of green |
who wanted ta be cream | HELP!!:P
off he went and tried ta join |
and ended up like a coin |
he looked at himself and screamed |
ok i'll try again
*aheem*
There was a young chemist in Bealing
Who with plutonium was dealing
But he then added indigo lead
unfortunatly the truth must be said,
They found him an abstract on the ceiling.
its ok if i used ur format innit?:S
pick the best one please
OxYgeN
hi sir it's me HELIUM,
well this is my limerick i know it sucks but i hope it'll do...
Water's a compound, a single substance.
Made of hydrogen and oxygen, what a dunce.
But what happens when it gets heated?
Poor thing is defeatedand and gets turned into vapour.
And when frozen it gets colder and becomes ice, brrr cold!
neon:
There is an element called Argon
Of the noble gases, it is one.
Found in Group 8,
Sir, gonna kill you mate,
The task to write a limerick on it’s a hard one.
asalam wa'alaikum
in the holy moth of ramadan we learn about how to resbonsibilty and be resbect.
mr woang you no angry blease, this for child homework.
there was fag chem teacher call woang
everythime he blew the skool , bells rang
he jumped frrom his seat
and run to met his lovly sweet
who justt kick his thang
Beace upon laboratry for chemistray, inshalla'ah no flames for fire ,acid no fall from ub.
bye bye big boss
Zats reallly dumb
anyway here is my poem:
Atomic structures is a piece of cake n i got it
Covalent bonding is a disaster n i dont get it do u?
Our experiment was kool but stupid 2 do in 20 mins!
Well hope u liked it (I don't care if u don't classmates)
See YA In SKOOL
Chlorine:
Zats reallly dumb
anyway here is my poem:
Atomic structures is a piece of cake n i got it
Covalent bonding is a disaster n i dont get it do u?
Our experiment was kool but stupid 2 do in 20 mins!
Well hope u liked it (I don't care if u don't classmates)
See YA In SKOOL
this is titanium
when it comes to chemistry my mind blocks up
my eyes start wizzing and the ideas are up
i will try but it won't be so good
but at least try and do what i could
ionic and covalent are two types of bonding
(dah)
after this scentence i will need some funding(i'll be kicked out of home)
element are easy but need some learning so i better be off sitting and working
in ionic bonding metals and non_metals want a complete outer shell
but if they don't achieve that, for them this is hell!!
be generous in marking, plz sir!!!
Nitrogen :
Neon is a noble gas
20 is its atomic mass
with 8 electrons in its outer shell
it has no colour, no smell
it does not react
what do you think of that?
and that is the srory of the noble gas
mangenese says:
chemistry is fun
u can have much fun
lots of experiments can be done
they are fun
makes the scool into a bomb
Before I give you my poem I would just like to add that this is the stupidest homework that you have ever given us. I mean why did you even bother?????
Anyways, since you had to ask...
There once was a man called Nero
To many people he was a hero
He came upon a degrees so chilling
That every element was willing
To admit that this was Absolute Zero
Has it ever occured to you that some teachers don't give homework?
Anyway I have better things to do unlike some lowlife who lives here(AZiz)
Berry_lium
Atoms are tightly knit by sharing and caring bonds
They split their electrons into equal shares unlike some skanky blondes
Covalent bonding and ionic bonding help these noble gas wannabes
Become something they’re not kinnda like Avril calling herself a yank when shes so Canadian!
I swear I hate it when people try to be something they’re not, but I guess its ok in the case of atoms
for without their sharing and caring of their elctrons, i wouldn't be here typin away...
HydroGeN
sir!!..when you going ta mark em limy things?!!
neon:
hey mahmoud! don't insult asra! everyone has their opinions...we just don't want to hear yours! *glares*
I don't know whether to laugh or cry...
neon: laugh till you cry, sir, laugh till you cry :P
hey asras got a gr8 voice and sarah is like our lil UN..so mate ud betta sock it=D
and anyways avril..*pukes*..the "person" who claims ta be able ta play the guitar?..*sighs* i wish we could just throw her off a brigde!
that's 'sarah'. and yes, i'm an overwhelmingly smart superheroine mahmoud. when will you learn? :D
call me WHATEVER you want - do i look like i care? :P and 'anonymous' can play the guitar quite well, thanks very much. :D
p.s. isn't this fun?
nitrogen:
i didnt like my old limerick so i decided to write up another one (or more)
Cobalt is vital to me
For it's a part of the vitamin B.
It also makes ink
That's a very pale pink
But when dry, it's invisible, tee hee!
The soil had so much uranium
It killed my prize geranium.
It would have won shows
But now it just glows
Enough to light up a stadium
The compounds of sodium are great,
If you can tell the chloride from chlorate.
The one makes fried chips
Taste good on your lips
The other clears weed from your gate.
lets get 1 thing straight..u wanna diss my friends, u have ta deal with moi first..OK?....and avril sing good..KAAAK!!.jeez if i step on a cats tail tht sounds better=P
and why does she keep smashing guitars?..dun say that metallica does tht,coz HELL NAW!!
SO THERE>>U SOCK UR OWN SMELLY SOCK U STUPID COW!!=P
OxYgeN
(Heba) these r the best poems I can ever think of
there once was a bunsen burner
which made most solids firmer
particles faster
like the headmaster
that cheeky old bunsen burner
&
there once was that element hydrogen
which was really jellous of nitrogen
it's way so much lighter
that poor little fighter
that ugly gas called nitrogen
Sodium say:
Check out this stupid poem,,,,,,,,
inside a nucleus in an atom are electrons
but inside it are neutrons and protons
there 2 of each in the element helium
but 12 of each,guess what, not in lithium,
beryllium or patassium, it is in magnesium
sorry if i made someone get angry by reading this poem :-) c ya in s-cool
finished readin not 2 pleased by a post so u thinx 3zo0oz lives on dis site do u,u fukin hoe ged a shit ass life u bitch! n' another thin dis site is crap n' so r da ppl who think dis a mutha fukin forum! fuk u slutz!
neon: whoa...
(delpieronedved)says: thats my poem:
Hear my tones
It will break your bones
In the nucleus neutral neutrons
Setting there with positive protons
Outside in the outer shells
Our active negative electrons
Turning round in circular cells
This is so lame I can hear your groans
(basil)
Hear my tones
It will break your bones
In the nucleus neutral neutrons
Setting there with positive protons
Outside in the outer shells
Our active negative electrons
Turning round in circular cells
This is so lame I can hear your groans
mahmoud watch your words ok
I know I'm much stronger than u & I can bang u with the guitar ur showin off with anytime I want 1 more thing u say about asra good or bad u'll go down brother
since when were u the rock & roll star i know that & every1 might when I say u nearly passed taher & abbas from the geekness so zip it !!!
who r u 2 even say anything about asra I just dare u 2 do it 1 more time & thats when u'll wish u were never born!!!!
by the way this note is 4 mahmoud & fellow supporters
To Anonymous
This is your site to use responsibly for learning. If you choose to use the comments box for mouthing off at your peers under an anonymous pseudonym then you'll lose it and we will go back to reading from a book every lesson. The choice is yours
Phoenix
well excuse moi..bas wht was she doin at the end of the sk8er boi video clip..didnt look as if she kissin the flippin guitar!
LooL..itha u want ta make fun of me...learn ta spell first k?..whts jelose supposed ta mean?...did mahmoud jus invent a new word..*gasps*
and i am proud ta say tht yeah i can sing better than avril, ask me mates,,they prove it fer u XD
and y in the bloody 'ell are u comparin me ta racoon eyes?
if u are so obbsessed with her..GO MARRY THE 'ORRIBLE thing THEN!!..okii?..bas dont get us involved with "her"=P..aight mate?..now theres a good boy:D
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